Kids say the darndest things!

"I don't know why I keep saying ow, but it's really kind of driving me nuts even though I know I'm saying it."

- C (age eight)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Dad, look! Darkness appeared in my bowl!"

- C (age eight)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Commercials are kind of rude. They make everything seem like it doesn't have any bad parts and only has the good parts. It's kind of like they're controlling your mind and MAKING you buy stuff!"

- C (age eight)

Kids say the darndest things!

"I can understand German people! Even in English!"

- C (age eight)

Kids say the darndest things!

Daddy: "I'm not in charge of that."

C: "Yes, I know. Like you're in charge of telling me what I already know!"

- C (age 8)

Kids say the darndest things!

(after playing piano to a metronome for one hour)

"Wow! Dad! Music is exactly like setting up checkers!"

- C (age eight)

Kids say the darndest things!

(written on a piece of paper hung on the fridge)

"C's list of inches:
12 inches
13 inches
52 inches
3 inches
23 inches
16 inches"

- C (age 8)

Kids say the darndest things!

"All the things that matter are the worries we should keep. We don't need to worry about all the little things too."

- C (age 8)

Kids say the darndest things!

"If I agreed with you we'd BOTH be wrong!"

- C (age 8)

Kids say the darndest things!

Daddy: "Be careful you're going to..."

C: "I know. I'm going to fall down and hit my head on the grill and break my head open and die! Goodbye!"

- C (age 8)

Kids say the darndest things!

"I can see through invisible stuff!"

- C (age 8)

Kids say the darndest things!

"WowEow. I suction-cupped myself to the marshmallow!"

- C (age 8)

Kids say the darndest things!

C: "I'm an inventor."

Daddy: "Ok, what are you inventing?"

C: "I'm inventing a contraction."

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Daddy, when I sleep my hair goes crazy. You're lucky that you don't have any hair."

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"This is seriously funny!"

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Live is better than a tangled iPod!"

- C (age seven, proud owner of M's old iPod nano)

Kids say the darndest things!

C: "Daddy, what's an axy....er.....oxymoron?"

Daddy: "An oxymoron is like two words that commonly go together but kind of contradict each other. Hang on and I'll think of an example that you would understand."

C: "Oh. You mean like 'rubber-cement'?"

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

C and daddy walking down High St:

C: "Daddy, why is that man asking for money?"

Daddy: "Because some people don't have jobs and when they want money for something they have to ask other people."

C: "Why didn't we give him any then?"

Daddy: "Well, because if I just give him money, he might spend it on something other than getting help - like cigarettes or liquor."

C: "So no one can help him because he might be lying?"

Daddy: "Oh no. We can definitely help him - in fact we already have. I already gave a whole bunch of money this year to places that offer help to people who need it. So I know there are places he can go if he really needs help."

C: "Oh. You mean like a bank?"

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

Daddy: How many children will you have?

C: I am not going to have any children.

Daddy: Ok. That part is up to you.

C: Yep, the girls make all the decisions!

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Dear Daddy,

I love you so much and even when you die I know you will still be with me.

Love, C"

- C (age seven)