Kids say the darndest things!

"You know what I hate about rain? When it gets into your sandals. Then it looks, feels and sounds disgusting."

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"I'm not weird, I'm just a person who likes tasting weird things."

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Dad, 'en Francais' means French in French."

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Come on, evolve yourself! ! !"

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

Mommy to Daddy in the middle of a conversation: "You're just dangling a carrot out in front of me."

C: "I know what you're talking about and that's NOT a carrot!"

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"I have everything I need! I have a disposable lunch, my toothbrush, my toothpaste, a change of clothes and my pajamas in my backback. I also have a "thank you" and a "your welcome" in my heart just in case."

- C (age seven) describing how ready she is for her sleepover with her friend tonight

Mom's say the darndest things!

"This is why bands shouldn't do covers. Because if you suck you can tell!"

-M (age 34) listening to a bad rock band playing for Race For The Cure right outside our condo complex.

Kids say the darndest things!

The Magnolia

The magnolia is a tree
That has beautiful flowers
On it and the flower smells
So sweet that I just want
To pick it.
But wait, if I pick this flower,
Then it would die
And I would not want that
To happen.

(C - age seven - to Mom for Mother's Day)

Kids say the darndest things!

"That's not a roar, that's a violent squeal!"

(C - age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"I'm imagining what God's house looks like. I think it's red with a little green and some yellow and orange too. It has lots of rooms in it and there are no slaves."

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Daddy, I think the force is just engineering. If you want something to move by itself you just engineer a remote control and push the buttons when nobody's looking."

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Trust the Chloe..."

- C (age seven), right index finger held aloft with eyes at a sage-like half mast

And the master said...

"The spirit of resistance to government is so valuable on certain occasions that I wish it to be always kept alive. It will often be exercised when wrong, but better so than not to be exercised at all. I like a little rebellion now and then. It's like a storm in the atmosphere."

- Thomas Jefferson (to Abigail Adams)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Whoa...I'm being hijacked by weird things!"

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"If your nose was numb, it wouldn't feel like your nose was numb."

- C (age seven)

And the master said...

"...but as for me, I am tormented with an everlasting itch for things remote. I love to sail forbidden seas, and land on barbarous coasts. Not ignoring what is good, I am quick to perceive a horror, and could still be social with it—would they let me—since it is but well to be on friendly terms with all the inmates of the place one lodges in."

- Ishmael, Moby Dick, Herman Melville

And the master said...

These words were part of Thomas Jefferson's rough draft of the Declaration of Independence. Meant to be part of a scathing inditement of King George III, these words were removed during the two days of debate over the document by a group of representatives from southern states who used slaves, and northern ones who delivered them:

"[The King of England] has waged cruel war against human nature itself, violating it's most sacred rights of life & liberty in the persons of a distant people who never offended him, captivating & carrying them to slavery in another hemisphere, or to incur miserable death in their transportations thither. this piratical warfare, the opprobrium of infidel powers, is the warfare of the Christian king of Great Britain. determined to keep open a market where MEN should be bought & sold, he has prostituted his negative for suppressing every legislative attempt to prohibit or to restrain this execrable commerce and that this assemblage of horrors might want no fact of distiguished die, he is now exciting those very people to rise in arms against us, and to purchase that liberty of which he has deprived them, by murdering the people upon whom he also obtruded them; thus paying off former crimes which he urges them to commit against the lives of another."

- Thomas Jefferson (accepted with minor clarifying edits by Benjamin Franklin), July 2, 1776

Kids say the darndest things!

"I'm always interrupting myself."

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"I'm smart enough not to do anything."

- C (age seven)

Kids say the darndest things!

"Whoa! Bad cheese things!"

- C (age seven)