Ok, this one needs some background. We ran out of TP today and C goes into the bathroom and, upon discovering this, issues the standard call for help: "DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!" I go in, find that we're actually completely out and give her a box of Puff's Ultra tissues (the kind with moisturizer), telling her to use these instead. I walk out, shut the door. 10 minutes later:
Daddy: "Yes, sweetie?"
C: "This feels really good on my butt!"
- C (age eight)